27. Accepting the Unexpected Birth

Art by Shinichi Maruyama

Episode 27- Did your birth go to plan? Chances are, it did not exactly follow your perfect vision of how the birth should be, as most women are forced to accept some unexpected factor during this major life event. How do you cope when things go in a vastly different direction than what you wanted? Here to help us navigate this emotional, postpartum terrain is special guest Arista Ilona who will tell us about her unexpected birth story and give us helpful tools and tricks to overcome any birth experience imaginable.

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WITH SPECIAL GUEST ARISTA ILONA founder of Divine Modern Motherhood which is a self love platform to empower mothers! Check out her Instagram and her website and read her girl crush interview here.

​DEFINITION of ACCEPTING THE UNEXPECTED BIRTH: When you have been attached to an ideal version of how your birth will be, which does not happen as planned, and this really throws you off in your "welcome moment" to parenthood. This may need time, energy and space to heal and recover from.
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MAIN POINTS:

• We are usually not prepped for birth NOT going as planned.
• Arista wanted a water birth at home, so her birth plan was a tub full of warm water in her own home with a doula and midwife. Instead she had a c-section in the hospital after a string of complications...She then had complications with her c-section incision.
• Attachment to outcome can take you down. Try to trust in things happening for a reason or trying to stay unattached to any outcome other than a heathy mama and a healthy baby.
• You can get in your own way wanting the birth to be perfect, instead focus on it all being perfect, no matter what happens. We call in any negative experiences to help us evolve.
• Birth is all about relaxing and opening, so try not to let any stress enter into your picture.
• Expect the unexpected when birthing.
• Try to find the "lesson" in the way your birth ended up...why did your higher self-call this experience in?
• Arista's experience was the catalyst for her to be able to help other women in the postpartum period, and empowered her to start Divine Modern Motherhood. This had made her birth not going to plan as a blessing in disguise.
• For c-section mamas: Arista had her placenta made into a salve that she rubbed on the c-section scar to help it heal faster. She also recommends body work and scar tissue manipulation for c-section healing.
• WE ARE HOLDING SPACE FOR THE COMPLETE HEALING FOR YOU AND ALL MAMAS!

By the way, if you are pregnant, please read this book....

​THANK YOU Arista!!

Arista founded Divine Modern Motherhood, a self love platform to empower mothers. She does women circles, 1-day retreats, one-on-one coaching, and a mama/baby retreat in Ecuador at the end of May.  Find her on Instagram and her website and read her girl crush interview here.
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​CHALLENGE/INVITATION: Remember something in your life that did not go as planned (maybe your birth). Write down any negative emotions associated with this on a piece of paper and burn it with a candle. Feel these negative feelings drift away for ever. Also, Check out one of Arista's virtual courses one either Sacred Postpartum or Empowered Motherhood 101.

​Did your birth go as planned? Did it NOT go as planned? Let us know a quick (or long!) version of your birth story in the comments!