Paula Mallis/Los Angeles
Doula/ Founder of WMN Space
Insta: @wmn_space & @paulamallis
Name and ages of your children?
Madeleine May Mallis age 6 and Phoenix Justin Mallis age 9 months
What is your name selecting approach?
Every pregnancy my babes names have come to me through meditation during the conscious conception process.
What is your definition of a crushable Mama?
A mama who inspires through her vulnerability, authenticity and grace.
What is the most rewarding thing about motherhood?
The entire process and journey into motherhood has been rewarding and fulfilling for me. My entire life prior to becoming a mother I wished to be a mother. When I became a mother I felt a part of me that was missing was now fulfilled. Watching your children grow and develop through out all the milestones is beyond rewarding.
What is the most challenging aspect of motherhood?
The most challenging aspect of motherhood to date is 1) finding the balance between work and home life.
2) Practicing what I teach! Remembering to pause and not take the reaction of especially my 6 year old personal or that her reaction is a reflection of me or my parenting which can throw me into right or wrong thinking.
Where has motherhood pushed you to grow the most?
Currently motherhood is pushing me to grow with my 6 year old in navigating the teacher/student role. At times, Madeleine is my teacher and I am the student and then other times I know when I need to move into the teacher role. It is my responsibility to guide her with as much grace and ease as possible. Mothering a 6 year old and a 9 month old at the same time pushes me to grow. Parenting them both is not one in the same. Let’s just say for me the baby age is much easier versus when they become their own little independent people. It’s all a journey and an opportunity for me to grow, evolve and heal any childhood wounds that might still be present within me. I wouldn’t move forward in my growth in the way that I am without them. They have a beautiful but challenging way of mirroring back my work to do within my own consciousness.
What are your top 3 best tips for a new mama?
PAUSE!!! Especially when triggered or upset. Don’t feel guilty for taking time for self care to fill up your mama cup. Practice compassionate self forgiveness when judgments arise.
What are your family rituals?
Because my husband and I both work, our weeks are full on. Our weekends are sacred to us. We intentionally slow down and try not to commit to too many engagements in support of being present with each other as whole family.
What is your parenting philosophy/approach?
Our children go to the Waldorf school. We resonate with the philosophy and teachings of Rudolf Steiner. What I love the most about this approach (even though there are many) to education and parenting is seeing the child for who they are independent to anyone or anything. Our approach to mindful parenting, is doing the inner work ourselves as parents so that we model a way of being (versus doing in life) for our children.
What has been your biggest surprise about motherhood?
The juggle and the hustle!
What is your approach to food and raising a child?
We eat very clean, organic foods but with that said I have learned to lighten up at birthday parties for example where the food may not be as clean. We try to create balance but eating clean and healthy is so vital to their health and wellbeing, its our lifestyle. Again this is how my husband and I take care of ourselves so why should it be any differently with our children. We are all in this together.
What is your approach to disciplining your child?
If I could put my belief around discipline into one word it would be “boundaries”!!! This is not just an opportunity in parenthood but in life! We must all learn how to hold boundaries for ourselves and each other. My husband and I model holding boundaries in all parts of our lives. Of course easier said than done and there is no perfection trying to be attained but our intention is to be mindful, awake and show up the best that we can always open to learning and evolving.
4 tips to finding balance in motherhood?
Making space and time for your partner (if present) this is something that honestly we have the hardest time putting at the top of our list, but we are working on it and seeing now more than ever how important it is for my husband and I to create ‘OUR” time.
Your top 4 lessons you wish to instill in your child?
Empathy, Love, Compassion, Acceptance, Authentic Self Expression
What are you letting go of?
Perfection, Guilt and Exhaustion
What are you calling in?
SLEEP! Joy, Balance, Presence
If you live in Los Angeles drop into WMN Space and join Paula in a woman's circle and lots of other amazingly conscious events!
THANK YOU PAULA, WE LOVE YOU!!!