By Natalia Benson, Image by Marianna Senchina
Are you looking to get the most out of your most recent uncoupling? Here's how...
Breakups. Dare I say one of the most challenging experiences we go through as human beings. Challenging in the sense that our ego translates this experience as a death of some kind, our brain neurology also counts it as one of pain, as if weening ourselves off of a narcotic. It seems to be a battle between emotion and logic, the greatest human dilemma.
From a spiritual perspective (or mine at least), human relationships are one of the deepest spaces for evolution and growth. The release of a relationship allows for an opportunity to turn into the power and sustenance of our internal / eternal Being.
Ok, yes great, but you’re still heart broken- what to do?
Spending much of my twenties dating or single, I’ve had my shares of goodbye’s and releases- ironically despite the duration of some of these relationships the feeling of unspeakable pain and abandonment was nearly unparalleled to that of a broken limb. Moving through these spaces many times (as well as the release of two very major loves) taught me some exquisite tools on what to do and perhaps also what not to do.
But also, what I will say is this: there are no “shoulds” or “should nots” in the authenticity of the heart's truth.
The point here is to cultivate a relationship with your internal dialogue, but the challenge in heartache is this: What is my soul speaking and what is my ego? What moves me towards healing and peace and what one towards chaos and pain? Let’s explore some tools on how to handle ourselves in the turmoil of release and get into touch with our own authentic hearts voice during these times.
Self-awareness is key here. I’ve had some very wise friends tell me, it’s ok for a break up to be a process, but then at some point, it is best to release all communication until you are truly feeling healed and back in your center. Also be cautious of who you talk to about your break-up with. I would avoid overly judgmental or harsh people at this time. Share your emotions with a trusted, gentle friend, family member, yoga teacher or therapist.
I truly hope this article assists you or someone you love in finding empowerment and light through challenge. I would love to hear your feedback and the tactics that have assisted you through breakups in the comments below.
Remember- whatever “leaves” our lives is never truly gone- the beauty of living with the awareness of the Universe and our souls is that somehow everything comes around in another form, everything seeks to guide us home to ourselves. If we can see apparent loss as a movement to give us more energetic bandwidth for what is truly in alignment with us- we win. xx, Natalia
For more on this sometimes painful yet opportunistic topic please join us on our podcast episode
"Healing Horrible Break Up's" where Jenna and I get personal about our own journey of heart break and break throughs.